What do feelings have to do with achieving an impossible goal? Is this going to be a mushy gushy article? I really don’t want to read about feelings so I think I’ll pass on this one…WAIT! Don’t go yet! This is definitely not going to be mushy gushy and I promise this will definitely help you in your journey to achieving the impossible. Let me explain…
Thinking Creates a Feeling
In the last article, I wrote about how harnessing your thinking will drastically improve your ability to succeed. Thinking creates a feeling which drives action. I discussed how choosing what to think gives you the ability to create a feeling inside that will drive you to take the action you want to take. Let’s use an example to better understand.
You want to go to the gym? Sweet. What feeling do you need to feel to get you to put your tennis shoes on, grab your keys, and go? I’m assuming it’s something like determined, motivated, disciplined, or excited. What happens when you’re feeling apathetic, lazy, or down in the dumps? Do you still go or do you stay home? That’s an interesting question and will shine some light on how our feelings drive our actions. This is important because we need to be able to change the way we think, feel, and act if we’re going to become the kind of person who can do something impossible.
Continue to Be Curious and Have Compassion
Let’s say you’re feeling lazy in the example above. This would be a great opportunity to be curious and have compassion. What are you thinking about that’s causing you to feel lazy? I already worked out enough this week, I don’t really need to go for that run today, work was busy today, I don’t feel like it…lots of thoughts like these create the feeling of laziness for me. Am I mad at myself for having those thoughts? Nope. I’m well aware that’s it easier to learn more about myself with compassion than hate.
What does this example have to do with your impossible goal? To achieve your impossible goal, we’ve already figured out that it takes one step at a time, one action at a time to climb that mountain. So, we can harness your ability to think big and take responsibility for your feelings one example at a time.
When you realize that the reason you don’t want to go to the gym is because you’re feeling lazy, you can ask yourself why you’re feeling lazy. When you realize, with compassion, the reason you’re feeling lazy is because of a thought you’re thinking, you can then decide on purpose what you want to do next. Will you accept the part of yourself that doesn’t really feel like it because you had a long day at work, and choose to go anyway? Or you could choose not to go, take this as an opportunity to learn and continue on with the day. Either way, you are accepting responsibility for your thought, feeling, and action and that’s the most important thing.
We Are in Control
If we think our feelings are uncontrollable then we will assume we can’t change them or have much say in what we do next. If I believe that my feeling of laziness is just the way it is, then I’ll be much more inclined to stay on the couch. When I realize that I am not only in control of my thoughts and therefore feelings, but also able to create and change my feelings, then I can take control of this gym situation however I want to.
When we skip the part where a thought creates our feelings, it can be easy to blame the situation (a crazy day at work for example) for how we feel. When we blame something outside of ourselves for how we feel, then we have to rely on outer circumstances to create the feelings we want to have. [For me to feel motivated to go to the gym, I have to have an easy day at work.]
We have to acknowledge that our thoughts create our feelings so we can take back control of our feelings and therefore our actions. This is how we take emotional responsibility for ourselves.
One step at a time, one thought at a time, one feeling a time. All the way to doing something impossible.